By Samantha Swindler / Managing Editor

On the day Denise Metzger Taylor thought, “I have to bury my daughter,” she was able to say “I get to release her into God’s hands.” 

“I Get To” was one of many motivational tools Denise used to encourage her daughter Jonnae and herself throughout Jonnae’s fight with leukemia, which ended in the summer of 2008. 

And the new book, “Heavenly Birth,” is Denise’s self-published account of the last nine months of Jonnae’s life, starting with her relapse in September 2007. 

It’s based on Denise’s blogs from that time period and is broken into sections labeled by first trimester, second trimester, and her death, which is described as a “heavenly birth.” It concludes with a section titled “Postpartum,” in which Denise describes the year after Jonnae’s death.

The book, Denise’s first, was released in October and is her ode to her mantra of “I get to.”

“To go back and relive everything, I don’t want to forget any of it, but there were times that I felt I had to press through to do a book,” Denise said.

She had talked about writing a book even while Jonnae was still alive, and her daughter encouraged her, ordering her a birthday cake two years ago in the shape of a book, with the words “You’re Gonna” in icing.

Jonnae was diagnosed with leukemia on April 20, 2005, at age 12. Denise remembers that her daughter came down one morning with a pain and tremor in her legs. By 1 p.m., the family was headed to the children’s hospital — the diagnosis that followed was leukemia.

After two and a half years, Jonnae completed her chemotherapy treatment, but by her one month follow up, she had already relapsed. She received a bone marrow transplant from her older brother, but that also did not produce a cure.

Throughout the nine-month relapse and treatment that followed, Denise blogged for friends and family on caringbridge.org to keep them updated on Jonnae’s progress.

“There were many nights that I didn’t feel like writing, but again I would hear that voice, that said ‘you know you’re just going to put it off, just do it,’” she said. “...I call it divine guidance. There’s an inner voice that we all have and whether we call it our instinct or gut or whatever, it’s bigger than us if we learn to trust it.”

Denise, a former tennis player while at Corbin High School and Morehead State University, used strategies from sports to motivate her daughter.

Mother and daughter kept gratitude journals, affirmations, happy books, dream boards, and invented ideas such as “Wacky Wednesday” (a day once a week to wear wacky clothes) to lift their spirits.

Denise said she was watching Joel Osteen one Sunday morning and heard him say during a sermon, “We should really say ‘I get to’ instead of ‘I have to.’”

The idea touched her.

One morning, Jonnae was sick in the bathroom and crying before another scheduled chemo appointment. Denise said, “I heard myself saying... ‘I think this is when we’re supposed to say ‘we get to go get chemo.’”

The “I get to” thinking made them realize what blessings there are in chemo — “We have insurance, we have a children’s hospital to go to, we have a diagnosis, where a lot of people don’t know what’s wrong and don’t even know where to start,” Denise said.

At the end of their battle, when Denise told her they were taking her home and no further treatment could be done, Jonnae’s first question was if her brothers and sisters had been told, and were they OK.

“There was no fear, there was no sadness. It amazed me the strength that I saw, and the surrender,” Denise said.

Jonnae died a month after receiving the bone marrow transplant at age 15. 

After her death, Denise took the idea of “I get to” and created a Web site and completed her book.

Today, Denise is an inspirational speaker and author, traveling about once a month for various speaking engagements.

“I really just try to get out and touch as many people as I can,” she said. “That’s my calling now.”

Denise and her husband John are both Corbin natives. After making several moves for John’s work, they now live in Sellersburg, Ind. In addition to Jonnae, they have two boys and two girls.

Denise will hold a book signing from noon to 2 p.m. Saturday at Vittorino’s Italian Restaurant on Main Street in Corbin. If you miss the signing, books can be ordered at www.wegetto.com or at www.amazon.com